oneliners

This is a collection of oneliners. They are either original or I have forgotten the source.
  • Daddy, what does "Formatting Drive C:" mean?
  • A television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
  • It said: 'Insert disk 3...' but only 2 fit in the drive.
  • A much wittier reply came to mind immediately after I clicked the 'Send' button.
  • Don't make me use uppercase!
  • The lottery is a tax on those with poor math skills.
  • The cook book said to clean the turkey the oven had a clean button.
  • Sigh, always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
  • Chopstiks: like eating with your fingers, but sometimes you swallow a splinter.
  • Never hit a gift horse in the mouth.
  • Secret Asian man: giving you a number, making you chow mein.